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Thanks for the comment, and I can appreciate the fact that you said that. I obviously haven't gotten over everything or I wouldn't have reacted the way that I did. I also do not need the constant validation - and I trust her. It is a common question so I thought a discussion here would not only help me but put other perspectives out there since I know I am not the only one that questions this...

Amarian

Workout three days a wee.

Jumping

If she doesnt come running back...slowly you will get over her and wont want her back anyway. And trust me, its hard at first but it does get easier and you do think of them less and less!

Falt

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Relationships take two people to fuel them. Are his actions trustworthy? If so, why can't I trust him? If not, why am I with him?

Amoeban

So my advice to the OP is, as a 34 year old man who is single but not at all against the idea of long term relationships, telling men what YOU want isn't going to get you much progress. Telling me you want a family and kids and all of that stuff as a defense response to the question of sex in dating is the wrong approach. I can hear a 24 year old waitress tell me what she wants whenever I choose (and immediately disregard it, for that matter). If I'm dating someone closer to my own age with a relationship in mind, I don't want to hear what you want. I want to see what you do. I want to see all my effort appreciated with thank yous and smiles. I want all my phone calls and texts answered or returned. I want to see that the attraction is mutual, and little things I do such as gifts and favors returned. I want to know that I get priority over your friends and other such unnecessary activities. If you think men in their 30s are going to chase you while you disregard them as you did in your 20s you're not going to have much luck. Physical beauty isn't enough anymore.

Baconer

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Mob

Oh, and one other thing to remember ... he can't read your mind. So stop assuming that he should "KNOW" when to call you, or "KNOW" when you're upset, or "KNOW" anything else about you and how you're feeling. The only way men "KNOW" anything is if you tell them. (Disclaimer: Even then, you might have to tell them again a week later just to remind them)

Streamside

Well I told him he should have told her no and he said he felt he had to say yes as it would be too uncomfortable to say no... :/

Michelin

College student, amateur music journalist, music business major, and an usher at my local performing arts center. Music business management management major. Short and chubby. Let's smoke a j and.

Gullion

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Cockle

Why did you break up?

Destinies

Thanks for replying it's good to know I'm not alone even though I feel the same. I get ANGRY inside and keep it bottled. With my ex husband there was a lot of abuse aside from whatever his obsession was or quest for PERFECT. Yes I am scarred. I have been able to talk to this guy about the abuse but the sex thing is not only humiliating it is plain embarassing and hideous (to me). I could always see or feel the difference with my ex the difference in 'looking' as most people do compared to GAWKING as I told him and was upfront about my feelings because we were married and I felt betrayed over time. There were times I caught him in the middle of the night (not pictures) and it hurt me then angered me to where the last several years I couldn't stand him near me. With this guy I would feel better if we were engaged somehow I know that. Now I am fuming that he may have watched the victoria's secret special last night and that's why he didn't invite me over. That I don't get him going enough. If I find out he watched it I am DONE with him for good because I suffered years of that sort of thing with the ex. I hate to accuse but I wish I knew how to ask. I'll think of something and say it's the wrong (airing) date and ask something about last night's tv shows. It's NOT juvenille to me because my feelings MATTER and I am a very open person sexually to ideas, talking, good communicator and sensual and I need a FAITHFUL man in all aspects. Sure, I understand everyone has fantasies. I mean I could accept looking at a mag and tossing it (soon). Now my ex WOULD have watched that show knowing it would hurt me and say if I wasn't home he would make an effort to watch stuff on tv knowing I'd be gone, yet he was pretty 'closed' sexually when it came to the real deal. Fairly inhibited. I have no problem with SHARED fantasies, porn (if agreed between a couple) whatever both are into. It always hurt me that the ex had a REAL woman, a loving, caring female willing to love him and chose paper. I need to air this someplace thanks for listening.

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Geograph

Am Tessy 33 single no kids and never married, am new here and wanna try something new! am here to make a new friend and hopeful my man, I'm seeking a man open, kind, serious, confident, cheerful.